Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
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It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
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I have so many feelings about this burrito
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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