i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
My room smells like vodka and shame
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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