I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
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