whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
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