I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
