I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
