your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Randomize