So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
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How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
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She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
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