can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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