I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
