You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
handjob tips. give me some.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
