Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
