I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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