turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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