I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Randomize
