I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
