You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
