Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Randomize
