i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
