just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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