69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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