I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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