In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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