Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
