sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I smell stomach acid.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
