There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
