Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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