Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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