Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
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