her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
