After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
