Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Randomize
