Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
