Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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