I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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