I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
