yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
