I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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