I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
