So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
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