I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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