Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
