You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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