ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize