i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
