Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
