Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize
