the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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