but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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