I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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