batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
you would pick up someone in the library
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
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